When asked what was the most awkward time period of their lives, most people would probably tell you high school, or just their teenage years in general. Why? The sudden growth in height leading to excessive clumsiness as our balance adjusts, the onslaught of hormones, uncertainty of who we are and what we stand for, peer pressure, acne, insecurity. The list goes on and on. Here's the irony: high school wasn't remotely awkward for me. Sure, it had its moments, but they didn't crush my spirit and send me home to cry myself to sleep.
I used to wear crazy earrings every day, and I remember this one girl teasing me about a particularly "out there" pair. I think she went so far as to call them ugly. I recall smiling and responding to her comment by telling her that she looked lovely that day. Eons later at our 5 year class reunion she told me that there was no snarky or mean response that could have crushed her more and she admired me for taking the high road and being "better than her."
I was smart, had good grades, had a fun group of oddball nerd friends and a fantastic (or so I thought) boyfriend who was in college. Life was good. And then, I walked across the stage at Memorial Auditorium in May 2006, and was asked a very impertinent question at my college orientation:
"What do you want to do with your life?"
High school had been easy because I always knew, without a shred of doubt, what was next and exactly how I could meet or exceed a goal. My life was sequestered into a series of tests, class bells, deadlines and weekends. This college business was entirely new because all of a sudden the only real authority figure holding the reins on my destiny was me. Worse— I didn't fully realize this earth-shattering transition. I was still very much a woman-child, without any clue what weight the decision of picking a career would mean. I started out in Graphic Design, since I liked to doodle in the margins of my notebooks and I had gotten some compliments on my artistic ability. You heard me right: I was prepared to pursue a career in something because I liked to doodle. O_o
I quickly realized my classmates' talent for design and migraine-inducing amount of attention paid to detail far surpassed my own and decided to change my major to an avenue I
knew I excelled at: writing. I threw myself into journalism headfirst and covered a lot of ground; I became an editor of the student newspapers, and successfully completed 5 professional internships before I was a junior.
Then, out of left field, the economy crashed in 2008 and the prospects of holding a job as a "whipped cream" major plummeted. I remember a Professional Writing teacher having us pretend we had just graduated and were looking for jobs, and I found absolutely nothing in Chattanooga that I was qualified for and paid more than minimum wage. It was definitely a sinking moment of truth; all that work, all that time was for naught unless I wanted to move away or go to grad school for a (only
slightly better) shot at success. In retrospect, if I had sucked it up and taken a grueling midnight to 5 am position at a news station, and then parlayed that experience into a journalism position at the paper or a local magazine, I could have made it. But I didn't want "
maybe if you work hard it will pay off. But maybe you just wasted 4 years of your life for a useless major". I wanted my effort to yield plentiful fruit. I wanted security.
This is a central theme in the life of Beth Warren. Security vs. The Unknown. During the course of my treacherous twenties I have swayed between the two like a pendulum. When I found out the dismal prospects of my current major, I went to the local student counseling center and took a career placement test based on my personality and proficiencies. My results were surprising; among the "ideal career" for me was accounting, counseling, writing and nursing.
"Accounting?" I thought ,"really?"
Then I looked at the annual salary of an accountant, as well as the stability of the finance industry and decided it was definitely worth considering. It wasn't easy; in fact I recall a teacher in Intermediate Accounting saying that it was his goal to try to pass as few of us as possible because he wanted to weed out the students who didn't really plan to put in the effort to understand the tricky concepts. I loved it and thrived on the challenge. Unfortunately, as I got out into the working world as a staff accountant, I had a few unpleasant realizations:
a.) The lack of variety in my day to day tasks, unless of course I wanted to go
back to school and get my Masters/CPA. At the time, the thought of going abck to school was about as appealing as getting beaten with a dead fish.
b.) After spending 6 years in college, I had never actually left Tennessee and seen the world. I ached for "the great wide yonder," and seeing what was outside of my familiar little bubble.
Security in a career path, while comforting, was not very appealing in lieu of my lack of world experience. Hence, the pendulum swung back again and I applied to the airline industry.
The rest, as you know, is history.
Now, almost exactly a year later, I sit with much more experience. I have flown all over the world, seen amazing things, and had my comfort zone blasted into a thousand tiny bits with a combination of jet fuel and enthusiasm. Its been a crazy adventure, and I'm so glad I took the opportunity when it was there. However, I can sense in myself a need for....wait for it....more stability. The next chapter lies ahead and I'm very excited to get to share it with you all soon.
In the mean time, here are some fun throwback pictures from my not-so-awkward high school days and the beginning of my ever-so-awkward college days!
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Me in college, Fall of 2006 with my little brother, on the day I moved into my new dorms at UTC[/caption]
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My 2005 prom dress and my "glass slippers"[/caption]
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showing off the kitchen and entryway of the dorm[/caption]
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lounging on the couch[/caption]
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Me and some highschool friends at Coolidge park one weekend[/caption]
